Chapter 1
The Move
The log house with red barn and Ford Ranger pickup truck parked in the back.
“Are you really sure you want to do this?” Jimmy Seymore asks his wife Suzy. “What? Move to Alabama?” says Suzy. “It’s too late now, the house, is sold and we have taken the jobs!” “I know, but look at what we are leaving; a log house in the woods of Maine!”
Jimmy and Suzy Seymore had just sold their log home on ten acres in North Ellsworth, Maine. Lobster land, Vacation Land, Life the Way it Should Be. They had lived in North Ellsworth for nearly 12 years. Jimmy worked for the State of Maine, Division of Eye Care as an Orientation and Mobility instructor for blind and visually impaired adults and children, covering all of Downeast Maine. He had grown accustomed to driving all around the beautiful countryside of Maine. Suzy worked for a private agency for the blind providing computer access training in Downeast and northern Maine. She didn’t know it, but her job was about to be eliminated due to the budget shortcomings of her agency. The two of them had applied for and been offered jobs with the Department of Veterans Affairs, Birmingham V.A. Medical Center in Alabama. They had accepted jobs at the Southeastern Blind Rehabilitation Center, providing services to blind and visually impaired veterans. Jimmy started out as an O&M instructor and Suzy became the Subject Matter Expert for the CATS program. The Computer Access Technology Section provided training to veterans in computers and technology that would allow them to become active and fully functioning in our modern world.
Suzy was from Birmingham, Alabama. She knew the people and culture of the South. Jimmy had only been to Alabama to get married and to visit her family at Christmas. People were always more friendly around Christmas time.
“Let’s say goodbye to Bruce, Carol and little Holly.” Said Suzy.
Their neighbors had become friends and walking buddies. Holly loved to see the dogs and particularly Silver Girl the Alaskan malamute. They would walk from their house to the top of a huge nearby hill. Suzy with her guide dog, Quoddy, Jimmy with Silver Girl, and Holly with Iris the little foxy dog they had gotten in Tennessee. That’s a whole other story.
Holly was crying. Bruce and Carol were visibly shaken as they wished Jimmy and Suzy farewell. They might not see them again in the foreseeable future.
“Well let’s get moving”, said Jimmy to Suzy. By then they were down to just two dogs, Sue’s guide dog, Beverly and Silver Girl. They loaded both dogs into the Subaru dog house and set sail for Alabama.
The Subaru Dog House with April Shinholster on the left, Quoddy and Sue on the right, with the hatch back open.
Chapter 2
The Party
“Where’s that guy from Maine?” said Henry Blake, the Chief of SBRC. “Where is that little fellow from Maine, ah ha ha ha”. “Hello Mr. Blake.” said Jimmy. “But I am actually from Michigan”. “Maine, Michigan, who cares!” “Awoooo, awoooo, awoooo!” as he howls like a wolf. This apparently was common behavior for Henry after he had a few beers.
Jimmy and Suzy are at the first get together of co-workers since they arrived from Maine. It is an annual Octoberfest put on by Fabious and Maria Kleinhans at their home.
“Don’t mind Henry.” said Maria. “He gets like that when he drinks too many beers. I am sure he really likes you.” Jimmy thinks for a moment, then says “no problem, I have seen guys like him plenty in my past life.” “What was your past life like?” asks Maria who has long black hair and large pendulous breasts. “Oh, I used to hang out with a rough crowd back in Flint. Lots of drinking and drugs.” says Jimmy. “I see”, says Maria flirtatiously. “Maybe we can talk more about that later?”
Jimmy returns with a beer and some pretzels for Suzy. “Mr. Blake is a bit crazy, don’t you think?” says Jimmy. “Well give him some time; he’s just letting off some steam.”
“How did you like Maine?” asks Dr. Breckenridge the Chief of Staff for the medical center. “It was interesting and challenging” says Jimmy. “Well I own some land Downeast of Ellsworth near Steuben.” Says the doctor. “I hope to retire there and build a house.” “Steuben is interesting, but does have some poor people with drug problems, mostly methamphetamines.” Jimmy said. “Why do you think that is?” asks the doctor. “Well Downeast Maine, and particularly Washington County is very poor and uneducated. I call it “Appalachia by the Sea”. Says Jimmy. “Nonsense!” blasts Dr. Breckenridge. “It has nothing to do with the economy or the level of education. You liberals are always blaming the system.” “Yes sir.” mumbles Jimmy as he slinks away.
Jimmy joins Suzy back inside the house and asks, “think it’s time we slip away?” “Yes, I am a bit tired.” says Suzy. “My head is starting to hurt and it’s too noisy.” As they hear Henry outside howling over and over again. “Let’s get out of here.” Jimmy says as he heads towards the door.
Sue walking with Kismet outside of the Birmingham VA Medical Center near the corner of 18th Street South, and University Blvd.
Chapter 3
O&M
“This is called a rollator” says Jimmy Seymore during his first O&M lesson using a rollator with an older veteran who has age related macular degeneration. Jimmy continues, “It is basically a walker on wheels. The wheels are designed to roll and turn as you walk behind it. There is a brake lever on each side that can assist you in stopping or slowing down while walking down an incline. The rollator also has a seat that allows you to sit down on when your legs get tired. But first you should lock the brakes by pushing straight down, before you take a seat so that the rollator will not roll out from under you.” Jimmy demonstrates how this works. “Here, give it a try.” The WWII era, veteran named Tom locks the brakes and takes a seat. “Hey this is pretty darn cool”, says the veteran with a chuckle. “Where would you like to go?” asks Jimmy. “How about down to the Px? I could use some soap and a few things.” Says Tom. “Sounds good, says Jimmy. How would you get there?” The veteran thinks about the question for a minute, then answers. “I think the first thing we need to find are the double elevators. Then you push the ground button and eventually arrive on the ground floor. Then you take a series of turns, first right out of the elevator and down to the end of the hallway, then a left turn down to the end of that hallway. At the end of the hallway you turn right and go a long ways down to the end of that hallway. At some point the floor changes from a rough surface to a smooth tile surface. When you hit the smooth tile you know you are close to the end. At that point you take a left turn into an elevator lobby. There are likely to be a lot of people around there waiting for an elevator. Then we take a left, no I mean a right.” “Well you got most of it right, let’s give it a try.” Jimmy states.
Jimmy had already spent several lessons with this veteran teaching him how to use a long white cane, and how to navigate down to the Px. The long cane is designed to detect obstacles and drop offs while being used correctly. “Correctly” is somewhat dependent upon which school the instructor was trained at, and how much residual vision the person has remaining. With macular degeneration the central vision used for reading, detecting small objects, or seeing the details of a person’s face, is what is lost. The macula of the retina is what is responsible for such activities, and is the only part of the retina which is degenerating. The peripheral vision remains intact and that is what is used for tasks associated with movement and the detection of movement.
Tom had been resistant to the idea of needing a long cane due to his vision loss. He was pretty up front and honest with Jimmy that he would take the instruction, but it was likely the long cane would be lost in a closet and not used. So, since Tom had some endurance problems and needed to take frequent rest stops, Jimmy showed him a rollator. Tom really liked the idea since it also would aid in his balance which at times was also affected. So after the physical therapist approved a rollator for Tom, Jimmy started instruction in its use and in locating various objectives throughout the hospital.
When Tom received his rollator, he said “Jimmy I really appreciate this and everything you and the V.A. blind rehab. program are doing for me. But you can keep that long cane, I won’t need it!”
Older man making the peace sign while sitting on a rollator.
Chapter 4
The Boss
Sargent Ricardo Himmler, most staff just called him Sarge, a short stocky man with dark hair, confronted Jimmy the next day. “I understand you quit training Mr. Miller with the long cane.” “Well yes, Jimmy stated, he told me that he would never use it.” “That doesn’t matter.” Stated Himmler. “You have to convince him that he needs it. This is a little different situation then you had as an itinerant instructor.” “Ok” Jimmy said. “I will see what I can do.” “And something else”, demanded Himmler. “You can’t take sick leave in order to take care of your pets.” “You mean when I had to have Silver Girl put down?” Jimmy stammered. “Yes”, deflected Himmler. Don’t you know what a waste of tax payer dollars that is?”
Jimmy thought to himself, ”And walking behind veterans with a rollator for six weeks isn’t also a waste of tax payer dollars?” Jimmy would think about this scenario off and on for the next 13 years
Silver Girl lounging on the floor in our living room at the house in Alabama.
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Silver Girl
Chapter 5
The Socialist
“I heard you were a Socialist.” Stated Wilhelm Brach to Jimmy. “Well that all depends upon how you define Socialist.” Said Jimmy. “If you think of a dictatorship, like Stalin was over Russia, then no, I am not for that. If you think about Democracy, it has a lot in common with Socialism. “Of, For, and By the People” isn’t a whole lot different than “To each according to their need, from each according to their ability”. Stated Jimmy. “That’s not Democracy!” Stated Will. Democracy is freedom!” “Freedom to do what? Rape and pillage the Earth for profit?” asks Jimmy. “No that’s called Capitalism.” Jimmy added. “Look at nuclear power. Wouldn’t you rather have a government agency in control as opposed to a business hell bent on making a profit?” States Jimmy. “Well I suppose.” Says Will. “Where did you hear that I was a Socialist?” asks Jimmy. Will says, “Well everyone is talking about it in the center. Most people here don’t like the idea of Socialism.” “Where did they hear this?” repeats Jimmy. Then in an instant, a flash back brought the memory of his O&M internship at Hines V.A. Medical center near Chicago. “Oh, I know where it came from.” Jimmy chuckles. “When I did my internship at Hines in 1985 there was this guy, one of my co-workers, a large overweight white guy who wore his breakfast on his shirt to work. He asked me why I was so quiet and didn’t share my opinion about anything.” “Well, I’m just a quiet guy.” Jimmy had said. But this guy pressed me and hounded me. So I said, “Look I am a Socialist, I doubt most people here want to hear about that, do they?” This shut him up, but it also cemented this image of me in his and in his friend’s collective brains. Remus Miller worked at Hines at the time, and he works here now in Low Vision.” “Oh”, says Will. “I guess they got one on you.” “Well between that and the “Catholic Worker” newspaper I was getting with my mail, pretty much created my image in the minds of V.A. employees. And it’s followed me here to SBRC, nearly 17 years later!”
The Catholic Worker Logo showing a white man of the right side of Jesus and a black man on the left shaking hands, with Jesus in the middle with arms on the shoulders of each man.
Chapter 6
Legal Blindness
“Don’t even say the term legal blindness!” Shouted Fabious Kleinhans, a robust stern looking man, in an angry tone of voice. “Blindness is blindness.” He continues. Each veteran should be treated as though he/she were blind. Don’t throw all those numbers and legal mumbo jumbo at me. Blind is as blind does.” “But most of these guys have some usable vision.” Shouts Remus Miller in an equally angry voice. “And some of them aren’t even legally blind; they just slipped through the cracks due to Dr. Merklech letting them in under the ridiculous “functionally blind” category.” “I don’t care!” shouts Fabious. “We are a 32 bed facility and we will keep the beds full under any definition that works!”
Remus scowls and is obviously fuming under his skin. He is a fairly big guy with a tough looking face and presence. He worked at Hines V.A. while Jimmy was doing his internship. Remus was one of the original Manual Skills employees, without a college degree at the time from a blind rehabilitation program. His background was basically that of a high school shop teacher. When he transferred from Hines to Birmingham, he was able to get additional University training in blindness and low vision from the University of Alabama Birmingham(UAB).
“Kleinhan’s is an evil man.” Says Remus when we are alone in my office. Remus continues, “he has done so many back handed lying things to my face, that I’ve lost track trying to count them. He is just evil, pure and simple. When I worked in Manual Skills he made me a supervisor. Then without notice he took it away and put me in Low Vision. He basically runs this place, and as you probably have noticed, Blake is an incompetent and not able to tie his own shoe laces.” “Wow”, says Jimmy. I guess you are right. I was sort of shocked to see Blake drunk and howling at the moon over at the Kleinhan’s party. “Ya, well I wouldn’t go to a Kleinhans party if you paid me. And his wife, Maria is just as evil.” Says Remus. She controls everything related to Living Skills and will not take any suggestions.” Concluded Remus.
You Tube videos: What are the Differences Between Being Blind and Legally Blind?
What are the Differences Between Born Blind and Becoming Blind?
Chapter 7
The Malingerers
“Just about half the veterans going through this program are not as “blind” as they say they are.” States Remus to Jimmy. “ You see, if a veteran is service connected for their vision loss, the greater the loss the higher the compensation that the V.A. doles out. Veterans are considered “service connected” if they are diagnosed with an eye condition, or have an actual loss of vision while in the service. If they are 100% service connected for their sight loss, they stand to gain a pretty decent annual pay check from the V.A. Sometimes you will see a veteran that has no measurable vision according to the eye docs, yet you as a low vision therapist will be able to get an acuity. Then there are times that neither you nor the doc will get an acuity, yet you observe the veteran reading things while waiting for an appointment, or having extra good mobility despite the fact that they claim to be totally blind. Some guys will pretend to be totally blind banging their canes around, groping and feeling for the wall…then on another occasion you see them cruising right along! This is called malingering. Sometimes they malinger as though they were totally blind, and sometimes they are just not completely truthful when you do their acuities. That’s why we have these other tests, such as the Figure Ground and the Farnsworth Color Vision test. With the Figure Ground you have them try to trace these shapes with different colored pens that get progressively more complicated. If they get all the shapes correctly, you know they have pretty decent central acuities. The same thing with the Farnsworth. If they line all the colors up in the correct progression from blue, blueish green, greenish yellow, tan to tannish purple to purple then this too indicates good color perception which is from the central vision. Now when you give them the distance and near acuity tests, they should indicate good central acuity. If not, you’ve got a malingerer on your hands.” rambled Remus. “And the management doesn’t want to know about it.” He continues. “It used to be that we could point out a malingering veteran and either set him/her straight or get them out of the program.” “I see.”, says Jimmy Seymore “So now, there is nothing we can do about it?” he asks. “Well we should point it out regardless.” Answers Remus. “And if that jerk Klienhans says anything about it, let me know.”
Chapter 8
Eccentric Viewing
The next day, Jimmy is busy writing a report, when Garth Beck knocks on his door. Garth works in Low Vision and is a bit on the “eccentric” side. His long white beard nearly comes down to his ample waist line. He wears cowboy boots and a Stetson hat with long sleeve shirts and a gamblers vest. “What’s happening?” Garth explodes into Jimmy’s office. “Huh? Oh hello Garth, just finishing up some reports. How are you?” asks Jimmy. “Oh, just as happy as a hummingbird!” states Garth. Have you gotten the recent word from that asshole Kleinhans?” “Uh, are you talking about the legal blindness thing”? asks Jimmy. “Ya, that. You know he doesn’t have a clue about vision loss, no less age related macular degeneration? He says if the doctor admitted the veteran as legally blind than that’s what he is by Jesus! He doesn’t care that the lens flippers still use that stupid Snellen eye chart, with perfect lighting and looking straight ahead without eye movement. The majority of these guys, if left to using eye movement can look around their scotoma and have great central visual acuity! I should know, I have a juvenile form of macular degeneration.” “Oh wow, I didn’t know that about you. So you have to use eccentric viewing all the time in order to read and write anything too!” “That’s right kiddo! I know the scoop because I shovels the poop!” explains Garth. “What is it about eccentric viewing that enables a person with macular degeneration to have such great functional vision; I mean well relatively good vision?” asks Jimmy. “It’s nothing buckaroo begins Garth. You understand that the part of the retina effected by ARM is the macula, which is responsible for central vision, right?” “Yep.” Interjects Jimmy. “Well when the macula begins to degenerate, like some of these old veterans, ha ha. It develops what is called a central scotoma. Scotomas can be relative, in that they are translucent, or they can be absolute in that they are black. Either way, the veteran needs to learn how to look around their scotoma. When we do a Tangent Screen or an Amsler Grid; that thing your mother probably has plastered to her refrigerator door.” “Yes she did when she was in her 80’s and had been diagnosed with ARM.” States Jimmy. “Well if we live long enough we will probably either have or know somebody who has ARM.” Continues Garth. “ At any rate, we can determine through our various testing approximately where the central scotoma is, and how large it is. Also when we begin training the veteran in eccentric viewing we can usually find the area where they have the best ability to move their eye for the best results. The biggest problem some veterans have is holding that eye position while they try to read. And don’t let them fool you, moving the head instead of the eye just confuses things. “ “I see” says Jimmy. Thanks for the information. I’ve noticed my wife, Suzy moving her head around in order to find her little bit of visual field that works, I should show her how to move her eyes instead!” Garth responds, “Well it doesn’t work for everybody, and it sounds like she has more of a peripheral field problem as opposed to a central scotoma. Am I right?” boasts Garth. “Ya, I suppose you are, I suppose you are.” Jimmy recedes.
Image of two children viewed by a person with normal vision and the same two children viewed by someone with AMD.
Chapter 9
Have a Blessed Day
Jimmy had been raised Catholic, but hadn’t been a practicing Catholic for several years. Suzy was a practicing Whiskeypalian. When the couple first moved South from Maine, they noticed that the further south they got the more frequently they heard the expression, ”Have a blessed day.” Everywhere they went, at the gas station, the take out fast food joint, the motel hostess, even casual encounters on the streets, people would say, “Have a blessed day”. It was like they assumed that you had the same belief system as them. Jimmy was tempted to say back at them, “blessed be” the pagan equivalent, or when he got real tired of hearing it, “have a cursed day”. But of course he would never utter anything like that. It was more likely to sound like, ”You too.” It didn’t seem to bother Suzy as much. She had been raised in the South and was familiar with the colloquialism. But the Bible Belt annoyed Jimmy. It probably annoyed him more than other aspects of living in the South. One thing that really amused him was the African American response to Suzy’s German shepherd guide dog. Sometimes it would be funny, like when a woman would initially freak out at the sight of her dog and then realize what the dog was for and begin laughing at herself and acting apologetic. Then there were others who reacted in an impulsive sheer panic and didn’t think it was funny. Then you would have your 6 foot 5 inch black man who would plaster himself against the nearest wall and hope the dog didn’t notice him.
This was all understandable that a German shepherd would illicit this response given the use of shepherds against African Americans during the early civil rights days.
The anger of African Americans appeared to linger even in their youth, who were not alive during the Civil Rights Era. It was a common experience to walk into a restaurant or store and present yourself to order a meal or buy something. The young African American behind the counter would frequently not make eye contact or acknowledge you at all. Jimmy had one such experience at a restaurant where the staff at SBRC would frequently go out to lunch. After giving his order for food, the young woman just stood there holding a plastic glass. “Oh, you want me to tell you what I want to drink.”, Stammered Jimmy. Without uttering a word the young woman just stood there holding the glass….amen.
There were many little quirks about the South that Jimmy didn’t understand or feel comfortable with. The combination of living in the South and having co-workers who seemed to hate him, led Jimmy into a mild depression. The SBRC seemed to be a divided crew, with a good number of individuals who hated the Kleinhans’s, another group were ambivalent, and another who were fully in support of them. Jimmy and Suzy didn’t feel comfortable with any of the above.
HAVE A BLESSED DAY
Chapter 10
Lunch
When Jimmy and Suzy Seymore worked together at the SBRC, they went out to lunch nearly every day. Nobody had ever said anything about the duration or time that lunch was supposed to take place. So without any plan or intention to deviate from the rules, they often took lunch from 11:30 to 12:30. There were several good places to eat in the hospital district of the Southside of Birmingham. There was Lucy’s, which was sort of a gourmet coffee shop with soups and sandwiches, Tracey’s which was a Southern three vegetables and meat buffet, and their favorite The Golden Temple, which was a vegetarian restaurant and health food store. They often got a few groceries when they were there as well. The Golden Temple was run by an American Sikh family, complete with long beards and turbans. Many of their SBRC co-workers frowned on the Golden Temple because they thought the owners were Islamists. Since 9/11 Sikhs had endured harassment from many Americans because they didn’t understand that Sikhism is a panentheistic religion that originated in the Punjab region of the Indian subcontinent during the 15th century, and has nothing to do with Islam. So the Seymore’s endured a bit of snubbing by their co-workers for simply frequenting such a place.
When Suzy took another position with the V.A.’s Section 508 office, she was located in another part of town. So Jimmy continued eating out for lunch, only usually by himself. He continued taking an hour for lunch, between the hours of 11:30 and 12:30. One day before lunch, Jimmy was confronted by his supervisor at the time, Remus Miller. “You have to quit taking an hour for lunch” blurted Miller. “And furthermore, you have to take lunch between 12:00 to 12:30.”
“What?” Jimmy asked. “Other staff is taking an hour for lunch, why are you singling me out?” “People are watching” returned Miller. “You just cannot continue what you are doing!” “Quite frankly”, Jimmy replied “Going to lunch is one of the few things about this job that make it tolerable! I will be contacting the Union about this.” “Humph”, was Millers only response.
Jimmy had noticed that three or four other people were actually taking more than an hour for lunch nearly every day. Cass Romano, the secretary, Abraham Bravery, the National Consultant, Josette Maples, CATS instructor, and Danny Grace, also a secretary frequently went to lunch together from 11:30 till 1:00 or even 1:30 on occasion. Jimmy contacted the Union and found out that lunch was supposed to be only ½ hour a day, but could be taken any time between 11:30 am to 12:30 pm. During an all staff meeting one day, somebody asked the chief, Henry Blake to explain the lunch hour policy. Mr. Blake was hesitant to discuss this issue and said, “What about it?” He then explained the ½ hour policy, but not that it had to be taken from 12:00 to 12:30. He didn’t speak of his secretaries taking an hour and half lunch. So Jimmy became quite upset during this meeting and blurted out, “You can’t have different policies for different people!” He repeated this several times before Blake acknowledged him and stammered, “ok, ok, you can take ½ hour any time between the hours as had been specified by the Union. The staff was upset that Jimmy had prolonged the meeting by making his statement, but Jimmy didn’t care. Jimmy became, from that point forward even more alienated from his fellow co-workers at SBRC.
American Sikh’s at the Golden Temple, Birmingham, Alabama
Chapter 11
Asperger’s?
Doreo Christakis Savinsky was an odd duck. Granted there were several individual staff members at SBRC who were odd or even mildly mentally ill. However, Doreo was quite a bit different. Jimmy and Suzy worked with her mostly while she was in the Living Skills section. Their contact with her was not as frequent as when she and Jimmy were both in Low Vision. Although Jimmy grew to despise her as a co-worker in Low Vision.
Suzy had one experience with Doreo while she was the subject matter expert in the CATS(computer access training section) of SBRC. One day Suzy was on the phone discussing a computer issue with another professional in blind rehabilitation. She sensed a presence moving back and forth outside of her open door, but could not tell who or what is was. As soon as she hung up the phone, Doreo blasted in and started talking, “I have this veteran who is having problems with his mouse. It just isn’t working when he tries to move one card over to the other. There must be something wrong with his mouse, but he uses it quite well with everything else. So why isn’t it working in this situation? I’ve tried everything I could think of but it just doesn’t work. Can you order him a new mouse for just one thing where it doesn’t work? He does well with everything else and I have no idea why this is happening to me at this time but not other times. I mean happening to him, since he is the veteran and I am a Living Skills instructor and have been for many years. It seems like he must be doing something wrong but it just doesn’t make sense that it only happens in this situation. I don’t really know what to do about it, so that is why I am asking you, since you are the subject matter expert in this field and so you should know what I am talking about right?” “Ok says Suzy. Who am I speaking with?”
“Oh! This is Doreo, you know the one that works in Living Skills, but I normally don’t teach guys how to use computers, however he asked me how to play this game and since he has enough vision to use a mouse I figured I could help him out, even though I realize I am not a CATS instructor, but just figured I should try to help him since he asked me to help him and I had some extra time to help him with this game he was trying to play even though I really don’t know how to play the game myself since I only teach Living Skills and really don’t play computer games myself.” “Oh.” Says Suzy. “What is the game called?” Doreo continues, “I think it’s called solitaire or something like that, but since I am not a computer instructor and do not play computer games I don’t understand why his mouse isn’t working even though it seems to work in other situations, yet since I am a Living Skills instructor and have not had training in computers and don’t know any computer games I figured you would understand what I am talking about and have a solution right now off the top of your head about this situation that I can’t figure out right now since I really have no expertise in this sort of CATS training.” “Oh” says Suzy. “I really would have to take a look at his computer and his mouse in order to give you an answer.” Doreo continues, “I thought you might know off the top of your head since you are the CATS subject matter expert and should know everything about the mouse and computers, even though I realize that most of the guys learn to use the computers non visually, even though some have vision, and this veteran has lots of useable vision, and I do not have the expertise to figure this situation out since I do not teach computers and only Living Skills and have been doing so for many years it just seemed to me that you would know the answer off of the top of your head since you are the expert.” “Oh” says Suzy. “No really I will have to take a look at the computer with the veteran using it to try to play solitaire before I can give you an answer.” “Oh” says Doreo and continues. “Well I guess I we can do that but I will have to look at his schedule and see when he is available with me in class and when we are not working on something else in Living Skills, since that is what I am teaching him and I really do not teach computers since I am a Livings Skills instructor and really should not be showing him anything on the computer so that he doesn’t get confused and think I am his computer instructor since I am really a Living Skills instructor and have been for several years now, which is why I was thinking that you would know the answer off the top of your head since you are the subject matter expert in CATS and should therefore know what I am talking about. “ “But, I really don’t Doreo.” Says Suzy. “Why don’t we schedule an appointment, and I will take a look at it.” “Oh, okay” says Doreo. Let me take a look at my schedule and see when I am not teaching him how to bake cookies in the oven, which is what we are currently working on, you know with how to measure ingredients and how to use a timer and set the oven and pull hot items out of the oven so he doesn’t burn himself, which he has a tendency to do since he was once a cook before his vision started to go bad, yet his vision isn’t really that bad right now as compared to some of the other veterans I am currently working with, but we need to cover these things anyway since that is part of the curriculum to teach Kitchen Skills which is what I do and have been doing for many years, you know that’s what I do and I think you may have done these things too since you started out as a Rehabilitation Teacher like I am and now you are a subject matter expert and that is why I thought you would know the answer off the top of your head, but since you do not know what I am talking about I guess I will have to finish with baking cookies at another time. How does tomorrow at 10:00 am sound since this is when I have him on my schedule for Living Skills and not computers since I do not teach in CATS and really don’t know what the problem is.” “Fine!” says Suzy
“I am sort of busy right now so I will see you and the veteran tomorrow at ten, okay?” “Okay” says Doreo and continues, “I will see you at 10:00 in his room where he has his computer, since all of the veterans in CATS now learn computers in their rooms, even though that is not how we did that for many years and I have never done that since I am a Living Skills teacher and have been for many years now.” “Okay!” says Suzy. “And now if you could excuse me I have lots of other work to do!”
The next day at 10:00 am, Suzy ambled down to the veteran’s room where he was sitting in front of his computer with Doreo standing behind him. “I just can’t figure this out, Miss Doreo” says the veteran. “When I try to move a card, it just doesn’t go anywhere. What am I doing wrong?” “I don’t know Mr. Bishop, I just can’t figure it out, since I am a Living Skills instructor and not part of the computer program, and really should not be showing you this anyway and we should be baking cookies right now since I showed you yesterday how to measure ingredients, set the oven and timer. But, oh here is Miss Suzy who is the CATS subject matter expert, and should know all things regarding the mouse and your computer, even though she couldn’t figure out what was the problem off of the top of her head yesterday when I told her your mouse wasn’t working when you tried moving cards in this computer game, which I don’t know anything about since I teach living skills and not computers and we really should be baking cookies right now. “Hi Mr. Bishop” says Suzy. “Nice to meet you.” “Likewise”, says Mr. Bishop. “I have heard lots of good things about you. I sure hope you can help me learn to use this computer to play solitaire.” “Let me take a look at it your computer, Mr. Bishop. Is solitaire open on the monitor right now?” says Suzy. “It sure is Miss Suzy, want to take a look?” Suzy took Mr. Bishop’s seat in front of his computer monitor. Suzy has a little bit of usable vision and could make out some of the cards on the screen with her nose right on the monitor. “Let’s see if I can find your pointer on the screen” says Suzy. “Oh you have a nice big one in high contrast that I can see.” “Yes” says Mr. Bishop. “Miss Doreo put a big pointer on there for me that I can see too!” “Well” says Doreo. I really didn’t help you that much since I am not a computer teacher and we really should be baking cookies right now, you understand.” “Yes, Miss Doreo” says Mr. Bishop. “Okay” says Suzy. “I am moving the pointer around, so that is ok. Let’s see if can find the cards on top. Okay, am I on a card?” “Yes” says Doreo. “You are on the Queen of Hearts I think, but I really don’t know since I don’t play computer games and am not trained in computers here at SBRC. But you could have chosen the Queen of Spades, since that is black and might show up better for you since you have so little vision and your nose is right on the monitor.” “That’s all right” says Suzy. So what you do is bring the pointer right up to the card that you chose and push down on the left mouse button right over the card. Then you hold it down and pull the card across the screen to where you want to move it. Is it moving?” “Wow!” it is says Mr. Bishop. “That’s all you have to do? There is nothing wrong with my mouse then?” You just hold down the left mouse button and pull the card!” “Yes, that’s all you have to do Mr. Bishop, there is nothing wrong with your mouse” says Suzy. “Oh, I could have figured that out!” says Doreo. “But since I am not a computer instructor and have no training in computers, I thought I should ask the subject matter expert about this rather spending a lot of my time on it and taking you away from kitchen skills and learning to bake cookies, which is what we should be doing right now, since that is what I do with you and all the other veterans I work with and have been working with for several years now. Why don’t we spend the rest of the hour practicing measuring ingredients again? I will meet you in the kitchen.” “Thank you Miss Sue” says Mr. Bishop. “I will bring you a nice warm cookie just as soon as we bake them!”
Doreo first entered the Low Vision section just before the Kleinhans’s had retired. Fabious Kleinhans hated the Low Vision section. To him blind was blind. All the veterans were blind, or would be eventually, and they needed to learn skills of blindness. Skills of blindness included learning to use the remaining senses; tactual, auditory, olfactory and proprioceptive. Remaining vision didn’t matter. When there was an opening in Low Vision, Kleinhans asked Doreo if she was interested. “How would you like to show those Low Vision people how to do their jobs?” he asked Doreo. “Well yes! She said. “I would love to do low vision. I have done Living Skills, including kitchen skills, written communications, braille and activities of daily living for years and years, as you know. I have taught so many veterans how to bake cookies and brownies and all that stuff for so long that I have gained loads of weight. I would love to teach low vision, as you know I am married to a guy with low vision, I mean blindness. It would be the ideal situation for me since I am married to Frank for so long that I practically breathe low vision, I mean blindness. But there are so many things to learn in low vision, like taking acuities, and doing visual fields, and color vision testing and and and and just doing it!” Fabious finally got a word in, “Well, you will do just fine Doreo, just fine.” Secretly Fabious knew that Doreo would drive the low vision teacher’s nuts in a matter of a few weeks. He was practically drooling when he offered Doreo the job. “Yuck, yuck, yuck”, he thought.
So Doreo entered the Low Vision section of the blind rehabilitation center. Fortunately for her, her husband Frank and the supervisor of Low Vision, Remus Miller were good friends and poker buddies. She worshiped Remus, and would do anything he said to do. So over the next couple of weeks Miller trained Doreo in all of the testing and training that was involved with low vision. She was a faithful student, studied very had and was quite diligent. After the training was completed she would begin to think of herself as the queen of low vision, even though she continually followed Miller around asking him questions. After a few weeks of this Miller was voicing his frustration with Jimmy regarding the persistence of Doreo. “She is driving me absolutely nuts!” said Miller. “I think this was a plot by Kleinhans to make my life miserable!” Miller and Kleinhans hated one another. Miller had once worked for Kleinhans in Manual Skills. He was offered a supervisor job in Manual Skills at one point, only to have it ripped away from him by Fabious Kleinhans. Thus began their feud that lasted many years, with neither one giving in an inch. At Low Vision section meetings Miller would scowl at Kleinhans and never say a word. It made for a very tense meeting with his negative energy absorbing anything positive that might be uttered. Hence it seemed natural for Miller to agree with Jimmy that Kleinhans had purposely moved Doreo into low vision as one final act of vengeance towards himself and the Low Vision section before he retired.
Jimmy began having more and more interaction with Doreo now that she was in the Low Vision section. One morning she burst into his office without knocking and asked, “Which eye do you patch first when doing acuities, the better eye or the worse eye?” Jimmy said, “Hi Doreo how are you?” “Which eye, the better eye or worse eye?” repeated Doreo? “Well, I guess I would patch the worse eye first.” Sputtered Jimmy. Doreo moved closer. It should be explained that Doreo was built like a fertility goddess. She had huge breasts and an equally huge behind. As she moved closer, all Jimmy could see were those huge breasts bouncing around in rhythm with her steps. Jimmy was seated in his chair, when Doreo came right up to him and said, “Wrong! You patch the better eye first and that’s what Remus told me.” As she uttered those words her breasts swayed back and forth like someone who was wagging a finger, only she used her breasts. “Okay” sputtered Jimmy. “Whatever Remus says, must be the right answer.” With that, Doreo turned around and charged out of Jimmy’s office. Jimmy thought to himself, “Oh my god, this is what I am going to have to deal with until I get out of this place!”
Fertility Goddess
Chapter 12
Henry
Henry reminded Jimmy of Henry Blake from the popular TV show “Mash”. He was basically a good guy that drank too much and at times, said some really stupid things. Henry really didn’t have a clue as to how to run a blind rehab center or manage people. He was a legally blind veteran himself and that’s about the only qualification for the job that he appeared to have. He used to host these graduation events for veterans completing the program every week where he spoke on a predetermined topic. Sometimes his topic had nothing to do with blind rehab or graduation, but rather allowed him to rant on some conservative political issue.
But he would always end his speech by saying “without further to do, let’s have graduation!”
Henry: “You know, as rough as it’s been sometimes, I think I’m gonna
miss you.”
Remis: “Well it might not have come to this if you had the backbone to maintain some discipline around here.”
Henry: “Well so much for missing you.”
As it turned it out, many of us did miss Henry when he left the SBRC. He was ousted by some back stabbing co-worker who went up the VA food chain to get Henry replaced. What followed was a series of seriously messed up individuals trying to fill his shoes.
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